Rachel Goodman

The festival of lights used to bring with it a gray cloud of food stress.

While the thought of crispy latkes and pillowy donuts with just the right dough to filling ratio is heavenly, in my dieting days, this thought would come packaged with stress and guilt.

Every year, I’d negotiate with myself how this year, I’d keep myself from losing control and feeling gross by the end of the eight days.

“I’ll only have one donut.”

“I’ll run an extra mile to earn the latke.”

“I’ll have one cheat day to enjoy it all.”

“I’ll save my calories for the party.”

Or I’d swear off those foods completely so I can stay on track and “be good.”

And every year, none of these tactics worked. I’d lose all willpower as soon as the tantalizing smell of fresh donuts and latkes entered the room, and just one bite soon turned into “Forget it! I’ll start the diet again tomorrow and eat as much as I can now!”

Then the discomfort of my overly distended stomach and guilt would settle in. At that point, I just wanted the parties to be over!

If this feels painfully familiar, you’re not alone, and I have good news: It’s possible to enjoy these foods without losing control.

I became a registered dietitian because I was a binge eater and yo-yo dieter looking for solutions. Today, I’ve helped hundreds of people reclaim their health and stop binge eating too.

If there’s only one thing you take away from this article, let it be this: binge eating has nothing to do with willpower, so stop the self-shaming and blame. It’s distracting you from addressing the real reason you lose control. In fact, the more you exert self-discipline to restrict yourself from these foods, the harder it will be to stay in control.

What the diet industry doesn’t want you to know is that restriction increases your cravings and drives you to eat more. Let’s explain the two types of restriction that cause this:

Physical restriction is when you go on low-calorie diets (FYI: 1,200 calories is the amount a toddler needs, not a grown adult!) or skip meals and become very hungry. When you’re not getting enough calories, your brain increases the production of a neurotransmitter called Neuropeptide Y, which increases your cravings, especially for carbohydrates, since carbs are your body’s preferred energy source.

In addition, when you’re not getting enough calories, the prefrontal cortex of your brain, which is responsible for your executive function (like making food choices) isn’t able to function optimally, which increases your likelihood of grabbing the cookies on the counter over the salmon in the fridge and overriding your fullness cues.

Mental restriction is when even when you eat enough, you have off-limit foods. You tell yourself you can’t or shouldn’t have donuts or chocolate. Having forbidden foods creates a heightened reward response from your brain. By constantly telling yourself you shouldn’t have a donut, you’re increasing your craving and urgency to eat them.

This is why diets fail and binge eating isn’t simply a matter of willpower. There are physiological and psychological mechanisms happening in your body that you’re trying to fight against—it’s a losing battle. The solution to stop binge eating is to learn to work with your body, not against it.

This is the premise of Intuitive Eating—an approach aimed to reconnect and work with your body to heal your relationship with food as an intervention to end the food chaos, guilt, and stress.

Chanukah is the perfect opportunity to start your food peace journey and end the food chaos.

This Chanukah, what would happen if you chose to work with your body instead of against it no matter what size you are?

Make a commitment to stop judging yourself for overeating or binging.

Food and your eating habits may feel good or bad, but you are not good or bad. Food has no moral value!

Next, begin listening to and honoring your hunger cues. You deserve to eat enough at every size. When your body is adequately nourished, it feels safe, and you can make conscious food choices. Stop saving your calories and eat consistently throughout the day.

Instead of stressing about calories and worrying about being good (you’re already a good human!), lead with tuning into your body and wanting to feel good!

This year, normalize your forbidden foods by giving yourself permission to enjoy them without guilt. Part of healthy living is enjoying food and the connection and experiences they give you!

Try this:

1. Remind yourself that Chanukah isn’t your only chance to enjoy these foods. You can have a donut before or after Chanukah too! This removes the scarcity mindset that it’s now or never.

2. Get rid of the food noise and rules! Remember that a few donuts or latkes over a holiday aren’t going to make or break your health.

3. Sit and savor the food you want so you can fully experience it. (Make sure you’re not too hungry though!) Pay attention to the taste, texture, and how your body feels. Is it as good as you thought it would be? How does your body feel? Will eating more feel good if you know you can have it again when you’re not as full?

Lead with curiosity and compassion. Healing your relationship with food isn’t a pass or fail test. It takes time to undo years of dieting and body shaming damage, but it’s possible!

Opt out of the “all or none” mentality. If you overdo it, learn to sit with the discomfort so that the feeling can pass sooner (eating more won’t solve the problem). Every eating experience is a learning experience, so ask yourself: What led me to eat this way? There’s a reason for out-of-control eating, and when you identify what it is for you, you can seek out the solution, continue making progress, and break the diet-binge cycle for good!

 

Rachel Goodman is a registered dietitian nutritionist, certified intuitive eating counselor, speaker, and mom of four, specializing in binge eating, emotional eating, and body image healing. She helps her clients break free of the diet-binge eating cycle and silence their inner-body bully so they can feel normal and nourished with food again while finding body peace. You can get her free guide: 3 Steps to Stop Feeling Out of Control with Food and learn more about her 1:1 coaching, programs, and courses by going to her website rachelgoodnutrition.com. To inquire about speaking engagements or to contact Rachel directly, you can email her at [email protected].